:48:02
lt's nothing against them, Doc.
:48:03
They're too busy lookin' out for themselves
to worry about anybody else.
:48:07
Well, take a good, deep breath, Buster.
:48:14
What do you think got you your orders?
:48:16
Prayer and fasting?
Sending in enough box tops?
:48:20
Dolan said one of my old letters turned up.
:48:24
This crew got you transferred.
:48:26
They were so busy
thinking about themselves...
:48:29
...that they took a chance of landing
in prison for five years, every one of them.
:48:34
You couldn't send in a letter for transfer,
so they sent one in for you.
:48:38
They knew the Captain wouldn't
sign it approved...
:48:40
...so they didn't bother him.
They signed it for him.
:48:43
Doc, what do you mean?
They forged the Captain's name?
:48:45
That's it exactly.
:48:50
lt was quite a thing to see, Doug...
:48:52
...the Captain's name-signing contest.
:48:55
Every man in the crew trying his best...
:48:58
...to copy that little scrawl of the Captain's.
:49:02
Then the judges decided the winner.
:49:06
At the time, there was some criticism
of their decision...
:49:08
...on the grounds that the judges
were drunk.
:49:11
But apparently from the results,
they chose pretty well.
:49:16
How did you find out about it?
:49:18
Well, it was a great honor.
:49:22
l'm the only officer aboard who knows.
:49:25
l was a contestant.
:49:27
l was also a judge.
:49:29
This double honor was accorded me
because of my character...
:49:34
...charm, good looks...
:49:37
...and because the medical department
contributed...
:49:40
...four gallons of grain alcohol
to the contest.
:49:46
Who won? Who signed it?
:49:50
l'm not at liberty to say.
Basically, they all did.
:49:55
And with just one idea in mind:
:49:59
To do something for Mr. Roberts.