Herbie Rides Again
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:24:23
Uncle Alonzo,
:24:25
I dropped by
to talk to you man to man,

:24:28
so I could look you
squarely in the eye.

:24:32
No, I am wearing make-up
because of a black eye.

:24:36
A girl hit me in the face
with a boiled lobster

:24:39
the moment I mentioned your name.
:24:42
This same wonderful, intelligent,
clear-sighted girl

:24:47
was able to convince me
what kind of a person you really are.

:24:52
I do not hold with your cheating
Mrs.. Steinmetz out of her home

:24:56
so that you may build
your concrete anthill

:24:59
on the spot where
she has known so much happiness.

:25:04
I think you are despicable,
:25:07
greedy, grasping
and wholly without principle or pity.

:25:13
I also believe
you are not a nice person.

:25:16
If you write my mother,
who is also your sister Frieda,

:25:20
do not tell her
that I wear make-up as a rule.

:25:24
I am going back to Missouri,
:25:26
so you may no longer use me
as a cat's paw.

:25:31
I bid you farewell
more in sorrow than in anger.

:25:35
Please do not send us
any more fruit for Christmas.

:25:48
Goodbye, Grandma!
:25:54
Hi, everybody.

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