1:09:02
Look at him. If I don't kill him,
he'll make war all through Europe.
1:09:07
But murder?
1:09:09
What would Socrates say?
1:09:12
All those Greeks were homosexuals.
1:09:14
Boy, they must have had
some wild parties.
1:09:17
I bet they all took a house together
on Crete for the summer.
1:09:21
(a) Socrates is a man.
1:09:23
(b) All men are mortal.
1:09:26
(c) All men are Socrates.
1:09:29
That means all men are homosexuals.
1:09:32
I'm not a homosexual.
1:09:34
Once, some Cossacks whistled at me.
1:09:37
I happen to have the kind of body
that excites both persuasions.
1:09:42
But, you know,
some men are heterosexual,
1:09:45
and some men are bisexual,
and some men don't think about sex at all.
1:09:50
They become lawyers.
1:09:52
My problem is that
I see both sides of every issue.
1:09:56
I'm too logical.
You know, the world is not logical.
1:10:00
If it was logical, how would Old Nehamkin
be younger than Young Nehamkin?
1:10:04
I knew there was something crazy
about that when I was a kid,
1:10:07
but every time I said something,
they'd smack me. So, you know,
1:10:11
I'm just racked with guilt
and I'm consumed with remorse
1:10:16
and stricken with suffering
for the human race.
1:10:20
And not only that, but I'm developing
1:10:22
a herpes on my lip here
that is really killing me.
1:10:27
What to do?
1:10:43
Arrest this man for murder.
Fortunately, he only killed an impostor.
1:10:47
I didn't do anything.
Hey, take it easy, will you?
1:10:49
You're bending my throat.
1:10:52
The Spanish government
will hear about this.
1:10:54
Don Francisco is not a man
who takes these things lightly.
1:10:57
There's Don Francisco now.
1:10:59
There's been a mistake. I know - I made it.