1:11:00
That's not like you.
1:11:02
I know, but it seems like we need
something to bring us together.
1:11:05
I thought a really lousy story about
Helen would make you appreciate me more.
1:11:12
Okay. As you know, she has
this funny sense of humor.
1:11:17
By funny, I take it you
mean peculiar. Right.
1:11:19
And it comes out
at the most inappropriate times.
1:11:23
I had just signed this client
- very proper, very old money.
1:11:27
Helen and I were invited to his house
for cocktails with him and his wife.
1:11:32
Well,
it was all pretty awkward,
1:11:34
but we managed to get
through the drinks all right.
1:11:37
Then, as we were leaving, instead
of walking out the front door,
1:11:41
I walked
into the hall closet.
1:11:45
Well, that wasn't so bad.
Anybody could've done that.
1:11:49
My mistake was
I stayed in there.
1:11:53
You stayed in the closet?
1:11:57
I wasn't sure anybody
had seen me go in. Aha.
1:12:00
I guess I figured I'd stay in
there until they'd all gone away.
1:12:03
All right. Maybe
I didn't think things through.
1:12:07
I was there a minute before I realized
I had probably misjudged the situation.
1:12:11
And then when I came out, the three
of them were just staring at me.
1:12:15
Well, it was pretty awkward, but I probably
could've carried it off except for Helen.
1:12:20
- You know what she did?
- What?
1:12:25
She peed on the carpet.
1:12:31
She did what?
Well, not right away.
1:12:35
First,
she started to laugh.
1:12:38
Her face was all screwed up.
She was holding her sides.
1:12:41
Tears were streaming down her cheeks.
And then she peed all over the carpet.
1:12:47
What did you say?
1:12:50
I said, "You'll have to
excuse my wife.
1:12:52
Ever since her last pregnancy,
she's had a problem."
1:12:55
Then I offered
to have the rug cleaned.
1:12:58
- Did that help?
- No. They said they had a maid, and it wouldn't be necessary.