:19:00
You can be whatever
you want to be.
:19:02
You want to be a loser,
be a loser.
:19:04
You want to be a winner,
be a winner.
:19:05
Jason, it's up to you.
You can do it.
:19:07
Remember, you're a Melon!
:19:10
Dad, that's easy for you to say.
You don't have to do any of it.
:19:16
OK, then.
I'll do it with you.
:19:20
What do you mean,
you'll do it with me?
:19:22
I mean just what I said.
:19:24
I'm going to college.
What do you think?
:19:26
What do I think?
I think you're nuts.
:19:29
Nuts, huh? Who made the rules?
Come here. I'm going to college!
:19:32
I'm going to college!
:19:37
Let me get this straight,
Mr. Melon.
:19:39
You wish to enter
this widely esteemed...
:19:43
Grand Lakes University of ours
as a freshman?
:19:45
That's right, Dean Martin.
:19:48
- Are you comfortable?
- I'm fine, yeah.
:19:52
Oh, the chair. I'm sorry.
:19:57
This is an awkward moment
for me, Mr. Melon...
:20:00
since I realize you're
a highly respected member...
:20:02
of our business community.
:20:04
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
:20:07
Our student body here
is handpicked by me...
:20:10
from the crème de la crème...
:20:12
of students all across
this great land of ours.
:20:15
That's one of the things
I like about this place.
:20:17
Yes. The point is, though...
:20:19
since you have
no high school diploma...
:20:21
and no transcripts of any kind,
no S.A.T. Scores...
:20:25
and you're 30 to 40 years older
than our average freshman...
:20:28
how can this university
ever see its way clear...
:20:31
to accept you as a student?
:20:34
As Calvin Coolidge once said...
:20:36
"The business of America
is business"...
:20:39
and the business of
an educational institution...
:20:42
such as ours
is to create young minds...
:20:45
that understand that
the business of America...
:20:46
is the kind of business
that it actually is.
:20:50
So, whatever it is that
I have said here today...
:20:54
the point is
that we are here to honor...
:20:59
our most generous benefactor...