:50:09
My thoughts exactly.
:50:28
Why can't I read this?
It's what's goin' on here now.
:50:30
- They'd never approve
of that being released.
- That's censorship, Edward.
:50:34
- That's not what America's all about.
- We're not in America, sir.
:50:37
Can we please not get into this right
now? You're in the middle of a show.
:50:39
Jesus, you could put amphetamine freaks
to sleep with this shit.
:50:42
Got an "Agreement on Guam"?
Sounds like bird droppings.
Oh, here's somethin' exciting.
:50:46
"Hubert Humphrey visits Capitol Hill."
Sounds like a children's story.
:50:48
- That's it. I'm readin' this.
- No, I can't let you do that.
:50:50
Oh, Edward, don't you ever do
anything that's not by the book?
:50:52
Not when I get into trouble.
No, I don't.
:50:54
You know, Eddie, sometimes
you got to specifically go out
of your way to get into trouble.
:50:58
It's called fun.
What's that? Come on.
:51:01
Take some chances once in a while,
Edward. That's what life's all about.
:51:04
- Find anything?
- No, I'll have to make somethin' up.
:51:09
Hey, we're back. That last two seconds
of silence was Marcel Marceau's newest
hit single, "Walkin' In The Wind."
:51:13
And now here are the headlines.
:51:17
Ah! Here they come at you right now.
Pope actually found to be Jewish,
Liberace is Anastasia...
:51:21
and Ethel Merman
jams Russian radar.
:51:23
The East Germans today claimed that
the Berlin Wall was a fraternity prank.
:51:26
Also, the Pope decided today to release
Vatican-related bath products,
an incredible thing.
:51:30
Yes, it's the new Pope-on-a-Rope.
That's right. Pope-on-a-Rope.
:51:33
Wash with it, go straight
to heaven. Thank you!
:51:36
Ethel Merman today uses
a test to jam Russian radar.
Here's a brief test of that jamming.
:51:39
Oh, I've got a feeling
:51:43
That love is here to stay
:51:46
When asked for a reply, the Russians
went, "What the hell was that?"
:51:51
Here's a news flash.
Today President Lyndon Johnson
passed a highway beautification bill.
:51:55
The bill basically said
that his daughters could not drive
in a convertible on public highways.
:51:59
Hey, we got a great show
comin' your way today.