2:35:00
And I am Running Bear,
2:35:02
betrothed to Pocahontas.
2:35:04
In the play.
2:35:06
20 grand for summer camp,
2:35:09
he's Mr. Woo-Woo.
2:35:10
We have brought a special gift
for this holiday feast.
2:35:19
I am a turkey. Kill me.
2:35:22
What a thoughtful gift!
2:35:28
Why, you are
as civilized as we,
2:35:31
except we wear shoes
and have last names.
2:35:35
Welcome to our table,
our new primitive friends.
2:35:38
Thank you,
Sarah Miller.
2:35:39
You're the most beautiful person
I've ever seen.
2:35:42
Your hair is the color
of the sun,
2:35:44
your skin is like fresh milk,
2:35:46
and everyone loves you.
2:35:48
Stop! Sit.
2:35:51
Wait.
2:35:52
What?
2:35:53
We cannot break
bread with you.
2:35:56
Huh? Becky,
what's going on?
2:35:59
[Becky]
Wednesday!
2:36:00
You have taken the land
2:36:02
which is
rightfully ours.
2:36:05
Years from now,
my people will be forced
2:36:07
to live in mobile homes
on reservations.
2:36:10
Your people
will wear cardigans
2:36:12
and drink highballs.
2:36:14
We will sell our bracelets
by the roadsides.
2:36:16
You will play golf
2:36:17
and enjoy
hot hors d'oeuvres.
2:36:19
My people will have pain
and degradation.
2:36:22
Your people
will have stick shifts.
2:36:25
The gods of my tribe
have spoken.
2:36:28
They have said,
"Do not trust the pilgrims,
2:36:30
especially Sarah Miller."
2:36:32
Gary, she's changing the words.
2:36:35
And for all these reasons,
2:36:37
I have decided to scalp you
2:36:40
and burn your village
to the ground.
2:36:42
[Yelling Indian War Cry]
2:36:49
Aah!
2:36:52
Children! Campers!
2:36:53
Stop!
You're destroying my text!