The Crossing Guard
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:23:08
So, listen to me.
:23:10
I'm comin' out of the bathroom,
right?

:23:12
And these two Orientals,
they're arguin', they're hollerin'.

:23:15
They're screamin'
at one another, and all in Japanese.

:23:18
So, I told 'em.
:23:19
I said, "Hey, you're in
America now. Speak Spanish."

:23:27
- Geez, you fucking guys.
Have a miserable evening.

:23:31
What was he doin' in the mens' room?
:23:34
Hey, Freddy. Freddy.
What?

:23:38
Hey, Freddy, you with us?
:23:40
I think we hypnotized him.
Freddy!

:23:44
- Yeah?
- He's on the rag.

:23:50
Did any of you guys ever have
a sound build up in your head...

:23:55
over a period of days?
:23:58
Like a vacuum cleaner?
:24:00
That the last time
you had an original thought,

:24:04
you got cocky
and rode on it?

:24:07
- Rode what?
- Rode on the thought.

:24:11
Enjoyed it...
:24:15
'til you started hearin' that
vacuum cleaner in your brain.

:24:20
- But you don't mean tonight.
- No.
He means some other night.

:24:24
Take my advice, Freddy.
:24:27
Get yourself a "youngie" and go
on one of them Laguna weekends.

:24:41
I gotta take off.
I'll see you guys later.

:24:44
Freddy, where you goin'?
It's only 11:00.

:24:46
Oh, man.
:24:48
Commitments.
:24:50
He's gonna go turn off the fuckin'
vacuum cleaner!


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