:38:20
I wanted to fuck him like a man...
the way that men do it.
:38:29
The idea of being fucked
disgusts me.
:38:35
- I'm scared.
- Of what?
:38:40
Something... that's inside of me...
:38:45
that makes me hurt myself.
:38:49
I keep cutting myself...
hurting myself, mainly the hands.
:38:55
But I don't do it on purpose.
:38:59
Maybe I do.
:39:04
The physical pain
doesn't bother me...
:39:08
It makes me feel alive.
:39:13
Now, let's put things in order.
:39:16
Two very serious things
happened to you.
:39:19
A rapist killer stalked you,
jumped you and all the rest...
:39:23
And there's a good chance that
he'll come looking for you again.
:39:29
Second, you got a shock
looking at those paintings,
:39:31
a shock followed by hallucinations,
the Stendhal Syndrome.
:39:36
That's important too.
:39:39
But it's an illness
that will soon be over,
:39:43
the memory of what you felt will
fade away until it disappears.
:39:48
For the moment you have to...
try to love yourself more...
:39:54
to stop despising yourself
because you were raped.
:39:58
Don't hate yourself
because he desires you.