:18:01
human beings
are not worthy of trust.
:18:05
It is human nature to lie...
:18:07
take shortcuts,
to lose your nerve, get tired...
:18:10
make mistakes.
:18:12
No rational patient would
put his trust in a human being...
:18:16
and were not gonna let him!
:18:18
It is our mission here...
:18:20
to rigorously and ruthlessly
train the humanity out of you...
:18:24
and make you
into something better.
:18:28
We're gonna make doctors
out of you.
:18:47
Two years of studying.
:18:48
I thought we'd have more contact
with patients. Didn't you?
:18:51
Hi. I'm Patch.
:18:53
You've just experienced
a North American greeting...
:18:56
whereby one person offers
a verbal label to another...
:18:58
as an expression
of welcome and friendship.
:19:00
Lesbian. Ball-buster.
Airhead. Leech.
:19:03
Whichever one of these disgusts
you the most, take your pick.
:19:05
- Well...
- Please pass the word.
:19:07
I am not here to date. I am not
here to flirt. I'm here to study.
:19:13
Thank you.
:19:15
I thought only I could repel women
with that kind of raw efficiency.
:19:18
Well, you just met your match.
:19:21
- Patch Adams.
- Truman Schiff.
:19:23
Nice to meet you, Truman.
:19:25
Will you go out with me?
:19:31
May I ask you one question?
:19:34
- Do you buy everything
the dean was saying today?
- What do you mean?
:19:37
I mean, that whole
drill sergeant thing.
:19:39
"We're gon' make doctors
out of you medical scum.
:19:43
- Now drop down and give me 20".
- Mm-hmm.
:19:45
That whole marine thing.
:19:47
We're not even gonna see
a patient until the third year.
:19:49
Up until then,
it's just memorizing facts.
:19:51
- Why don't they just shove the book up...
- Hamburger?
:19:53
Right here on the colon. That's where
it's going anyway. Thanks very much.
:19:57
- So, why do you wanna be a doctor?
- I want to help.