Very Bad Things

dog needs
a flea bath.
let's go.

oh, what if
I bring the wrong thing?

what if I bring
cucumber soup?

who cares!
you're a fucking moron!

shut up!
it's my
fucking opinion.

it's a stupid
fucking opinion, ok?

oh, thank you.
you have developed
this incredibly annoying
habit of talking just...

for the pleasure of
hearing yourself speak.

listen, he--boyd
brought up statistics--

hey, hey, hey!
leave me out of this.

the hell I did.
the hell you didn't.
you said--

the hell I did--
you said one out of
every two marriages
ends in divorce.

you said it.
I didn't--

you're an asshole,

you're an asshole.
oh, why am i
an asshole?

multiple reasons.
give me one.

name one reason.

give me one reason.
i'm not going
to give you--

you can't give me
a reason.
I don't have to--

give me one reason.
give it to me.

shut up!
I want one reason.
shut up
for one second.

give me a reason.
I want a reason.

shut up!
shut up!

you're just
an asshole.
live with it.

is this culver
party rentals?

yeah, can I speak
to whoever's in
charge of chairs?

can't you wait till
we get back there?

i'll pay you
for the call, ok?

i'm on a monthly
rate, here.

how am I going
to tell what call
is your call?

just use my phone.
hey, don't
be ridiculous.

no, you're being
ridiculous. you're
being a tightwad!

a tightwad, huh?

why don't you just
say what you mean,
huh? jew! say it!

all right,
you're a jew!

yeah, "jew."
I knew it.
you're being a jew!

I knew it
was coming, you

shut up! hello?
cheap bastard!
i'd like to
speak to somebody
in chairs, please.

you drive like a jew!

ah, how does
a jew drive?

4 hours and 15 minutes.
I can make vegas in
3 and change...

i'm not getting
a ticket.

i'm not going to get
a ticket for you.

you slow-driving
son of a bitch!

is this--
let's go!

this is kyle fisher.

I have a wedding
in a week.

we have--you're
doing my wedding
with the chairs.

every car
is passing us.

yeah, i'll hold.
hold? you're
going to hold?

for chrissakes,
call him when
we get there.

you're being a jew!
please get off
the goddamn phone--

yes, i'm holding
for tony in chairs--

don't hold anymore!
hang up!

it's 45 cents
a minute!

no, i'm not tony.
i'm holding for tony.