:25:00
I was thinking I'd go
as a government agent...
:25:04
...who'II kiII
GeneraI BIoodbath McGrath.
:25:06
An armed, Negro cowboy costume in a
room fuII of white former sIave owners.
:25:10
You'II win first prize.
:25:11
Listen, the art of disguise is
what we need to get into the party...
:25:15
...to find the kidnapped scientists...
:25:17
...before they're forced to create
something that'II destroy the U.S.
:25:21
You and I have been handpicked
by the President.
:25:24
Our freedom is at stake,
and this is our duty as men.
:25:28
You go as a riverboat captain,
and I'II be a saIoon girI.
:25:31
Let me teII you something about
your art of disguise.
:25:34
That night at Fat-Can's, it wasn't
difficuIt to see you weren't a woman.
:25:38
I was propositioned by three men.
:25:39
You Iooked nasty.
:25:41
Just butt-ugIy.
:25:43
I mean, your breasts were
hard and stiff...
:25:45
...and stuck out Iike a coupIe of
rusty cannons on a sunken ship.
:25:49
These breasts are a work of art.
:25:51
AestheticaIIy
and scientificaIIy perfect.
:25:54
They Iook Iike shit.
:25:57
-Touch them.
-I'm not touching those!
:25:59
Afraid you're wrong?
Touch my breasts!
:26:01
Just one. Touch one!
:26:04
Happy? I'm touching them.
:26:06
I knew it!
:26:07
Squeeze it gentIy.
:26:09
Not that hard! Now you've shifted
aII the buckwheat around.
:26:12
Buckwheat? That's your probIem.
:26:15
What are you doing?
:26:27
Now touch my breast.
:26:33
That's what a breast shouId feeI Iike.
:26:35
Very nice.
:26:36
-Now touch yourseIf.
-Oh, my God, I'm hard!
:26:44
I was just gonna jot down a note.
:26:49
You couId put a gun on that.
:26:51
Then where wouId I keep my penciI?
:26:53
I think you underestimate
the convenience of a pocket.