:26:00
How are we going to get
five times as many women to show up?
:26:03
We have a party,
but we call it a fundraiser.
:26:07
-Think of a charity.
-It's got to be the right charity.
:26:09
It's got to attract hotties.
:26:11
-What's the country with all the babies?
-China.
:26:13
-Romania.
-No, but wait.
:26:15
That's going to give them
the wrong message.
:26:18
All right. How about AlDS?
:26:20
There's a mood-setter.
:26:21
How about a suicide hotline?
:26:23
But do they need a fundraiser?
All they have is phones.
:26:26
Hey, backpacks.
:26:27
-What's going on?
-Inspections for drugs and alcohol.
:26:30
-What?
-Since when?
:26:32
O'Brien is in a coma.
:26:33
So?
:26:34
So the board instigated new policies.
:26:37
This is whack.
:26:38
-Can they even do this?
-I'll call my father's lawyer.
:26:41
Our parents pay a lot of money for us
to enjoy our college experience.
:26:48
Hey, my metal detector!
:26:52
I don't know how to make this any easier
for you. It's character evaluation.
:26:55
It's not unlike one of those
"VH-1 Legend" shows...
:26:58
...except you're discussing a fictional
character instead of a coked-out singer.
:27:02
Understand this?
:27:04
How about this? Dismissed.
:27:06
Ah, yes.
:27:08
-I don't understand my grade.
-That's the letter we use for failure.
:27:11
See me after class.
:27:14
-Do you have to ask him something?
-No, it's okay. Go ahead.
:27:19
Professor Alcott?
:27:22
-Yes.
-Hi.
:27:23
I'm on a Regents Scholarship.
I have to maintain a .5 average.
:27:26
I can do it with two As and a B+
because I can get a B in Physics.
:27:29
I can't get less than a B
because I'd only have one A left.
:27:32
The thing is, my roommates
never let me have any quiet study time.
:27:36
And now I've had to move.
:27:38
I have this kind of crazy philosophy
that your grades...
:27:41
...should represent your grasp
of the material...
:27:43
...not your negotiating skills,
which are amazing, by the way.
:27:47
No, I would never ask for a grade
that you didn't think was fair.
:27:51
It's just that since I have 20 credits
and I only need 16.
:27:55
I hoped to take this class pass-fail,
so I don't get kicked out.
:27:58
Sir, I promise I wouldn't slack off.
In fact, I'd work doubly hard.