Life Without Dick
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:04:00
The way she screams for me to call her
''puddle britches'' while we're in bed.

:04:04
That's not--
That's not true.

:04:06
Come on, it's cute.
You're cute.

:04:09
So cute, I could
just chewyou right up.

:04:11
Please. I just had
cocktail weenies.

:04:14
Beforeyou chew me up,
I have to use the ladies' room.

:04:19
So, Tina,
can I come back toyour place?

:04:22
How drunk doyou think I am?
:04:27
Guess not.
:04:43
Hello?
:04:45
Dick? Hello.
:04:51
What am I gonna do with you?
:05:07
Sorry. I'm so sorry.
:05:11
Sorry.
:05:14
Hello, 91 1 ?
:05:16
I just shot my boyfriend,
but it was an accident.

:05:20
I really don't think
thatjail time is a good idea.

:05:23
That's not right.
:05:28
Hello, is this 91 1 ?
:05:30
Oh, hi.
:05:33
Hey, listen, a stranger
just broke into my house...

:05:36
and got my purse
and took my gun out ofmy purse...

:05:38
and shot my boyfriend
and hid him in the basement.

:05:43
That's not gonna work.
:05:59
- Hello.
- Mom, I have to talk toyou.


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