1:33:02
After Jesse went to jail
1:33:04
I know my friends
said to me
1:33:05
"Don't you feel, like,
terrible being alone
1:33:09
in such a big house?"
1:33:11
I said, "No, I feel calm. "
1:33:14
That's when I really started
becoming a person
1:33:17
and started to live.
1:33:19
Elaine divorced him
while he was in prison.
1:33:22
He settled into life there
1:33:23
You can't say
it was good in prison
1:33:26
but it was as good
as it could get for him.
1:33:29
But of course,
the torment continued
1:33:31
and got worse because of Jesse.
1:33:34
My brother never
got over the guilt.
1:33:37
He had talked about
taking his life
1:33:39
because he had this insurance
policy he had taken out.
1:33:42
I think it was $250,000,
1/4 million
1:33:44
and Jesse was the beneficiary.
1:33:46
He said, "This is the only thing
I have left to give Jesse
1:33:49
So he has money
when he gets out
1:33:50
and he can make some kind of
life for himself
1:33:52
because I've screwed it up
otherwise for him. "
1:33:54
By that time, that clause
in the insurance policy
1:33:58
where suicide was payable
had come into effect.
1:34:04
And this is
the coroner's report.
1:34:06
It describes the cause of death
as doxepin intoxication
1:34:10
which basically means
that Arnold took
1:34:12
a massive overdose
of antidepressants.
1:34:17
I took a deep breath
and I said
1:34:19
"It's over, David.
1:34:20
He's out of his misery.
1:34:22
It's over. "
1:34:24
I thought it was a blessing
1:34:25
because the guilt
he was carrying
1:34:27
he was so unhappy.
1:34:31
He was out
of his misery.
1:34:35
The rest of the family wasn't
1:34:36
but he was.
1:34:38
I found it a blessing.
1:34:41
Let me entertain you
1:34:48
Let me make you smile.
1:34:53
It's unbelievably difficult.
1:34:55
I have to read
these horrible letters
1:34:56
about my brother being
almost killed in prison.
1:34:59
My friends call me,
I'm crying.