:27:00
How can you do that? Just a nickel bag!
:27:03
I'm a real American.
:27:05
I've been high, I've been robbed,
I've been broke.
:27:09
My credit is horrible!
They won't even take my cash!
:27:14
You're always talking about,
"God bless America, and no place else."
:27:18
But isn't it obvious
that God has blessed America?
:27:21
America is the richest,
most powerful nation on earth.
:27:25
If America was a woman,
it would be a big-titty woman.
:27:29
And everybody loves a big-titty woman!
:27:32
So, in closing...
:27:34
I'd like to say you are full of shit.
:27:38
"God bless America, and no place else."
:27:41
How about "God bless Haiti"
or "God bless Africa"?
:27:45
How about "God bless Jamaica"?
:27:47
I'm not talking about Jamaica,
the beach tribes you all love.
:27:50
I'm talking about stabbing Jamaica.
That's what I'm talking about.
:27:54
So, tonight I want to say:
"God bless America, and everybody else!"
:28:00
The whole world! God bless you!
:28:02
I'm Mays Gilliam, and I'm running for
President of the United States of America.
:28:07
Ya heard?
:28:31
Now we can watch Martin!
:28:46
- Hello?
- Good morning, Mr. President.
:28:50
- What time is it?
- I think it's a little after 7:00.
:28:54
- Lisa, I need some help in here!
- Will you wait a damn minute?
:28:58
I was so proud of you.
You were so good last night.