Chris Rock: Never Scared

I thought we was after Bin Laden.
Shit. When did Bin Laden give Hussein
the baton of hate?

When did he pass it on?
"They hate me, they hate me...

"they hate you! Run!"
"Oh, shit."

Shit, man, when I heard we was
after Hussein, I was like, "Really?"

That's so '80s.
The whole war seemed like a bad VH1 special.
Hussein's back and Bush is back
and Cheney's back

and Paula Abdul's back.
Shit, before you know it,
it'll be Hammer time again.

Stop. Hammer time.
No, when the war started, it was great.
Brought out a lot of patriotism.
Patriotism's beautiful.

But slowly but surely,
the patriotism turned into hate-riotism.

When the war started, it was great.
People had their flags up.

People screaming out "USA!" for no reason.
You go to a baseball game, a football game,
a basketball game, people are, "USA!"

I'm like, "Hey, calm down.
"That's got a little German on it,
don't you think?"

You know, people start freaking out.
People got it...
At first the war was cool. People got into
this whole hate the French thing.

I don't understand that shit. "Fuck France,
man. They don't wanna help us out.

"Don't eat no French fries.
Fuck the French, man.

"Motherfuck France, fuck 'em, man."
Cos they wouldn't help us out in the war.

The United States is the biggest,
most powerful country in the world.

Why the fuck would anybody
help us in the war?

Would you help Mike Tyson beat up Urkel?
Don't make no sense!
But people started freaking out.
The war was weird.