Kicking and Screaming
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:29:01
God, I'm going to be honest,
I--I didn't plan on
speaking tonight.

:29:04
I--I was-- I was
actually hoping that

:29:06
my--my assistant coach
would be here,

:29:09
uh, to kind of...
:29:10
[audience murmuring]
:29:13
Ladies and gentlemen,
I would like to introduce
Mike Ditka.

:29:17
[audience cheering]
:29:19
It's Mike Ditka, everyone!
:29:22
Say a few words.
:29:24
Thanks, Paul,
thanks, everybody.
It's--It's great to be here

:29:27
and, uh, gonna have
a lot of fun tonight.

:29:28
Paul's got the Tigers
on the move.

:29:30
All right!
:29:31
You live long enough,
you see everything.

:29:33
Iron Mike and Aluminum Phil
coaching the Tigers.

:29:37
[audience laughing]
:29:39
I couldn't really hear you.
:29:41
My Super Bowl ring
was making too much noise.

:29:44
Ooh.
:29:46
You see it, Dad?
Right there, Dad.
That was a great one.

:29:49
Read it and weep.
:29:50
[audience applauding]
:29:52
Ditka is a great coach,
we understand that,
but he's a football coach.

:29:56
Understand?
Right.

:29:57
And we are
still losing, Phil.

:29:58
Okay, I understand
your concern about our record,

:30:01
but with me
it's not about win-lose.

:30:03
We are going to win one game
eventually, right?

:30:05
Well, we've had
a rocky start,

:30:07
but with
a strong team effort,
we will win some

:30:11
I think.
:30:12
Remember,
there's no "l" in team.

:30:14
But there is an "l"
in win.

:30:16
There is an "l" in win.
:30:17
Hey, wait.
:30:18
Uh, parents,
Honey.

:30:19
I didn't see you step up
when the team was in need.

:30:22
Okay.
Okay.

:30:23
Phil is not
the greatest coach
in the world,

:30:25
I'll give you that,
but at least he's trying.

:30:27
I can defend myself,
please.

:30:28
You think he enjoys losing
week after week,

:30:30
in front of his own son?
:30:31
You're making it worse.
You're making it worse.

:30:33
What's with the birds?
That was weird.

:30:35
I've got my hands full
with Hunter.
I don't need a bird.

:30:37
Okay, you know what?
You got me. All right?

:30:39
The finches were
a bad idea.

:30:41
And I wasn't going to
say this, but I think
some of them have salmonella.

:30:44
A fair amount, in fact.
What?

:30:45
I may have inadvertently
poisoned your children.

:30:49
You and l,
we got something going.

:30:51
You know, maybe we can coach
the Little League together.

:30:53
You really
think that, huh?
Yeah.

:30:55
Coach Ditka?
Yes?

:30:56
Hi. Um, uh, our son,
Byong Sun, he's very shy
and I was just wondering--


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