:01:01
You see a guy holding a list,
you know he's married,
:01:04
He's in the frozen-food section
carrying a small basket, he's single,
:01:08
l hang out by fruits and vegetables,
Better chance of getting a guy who's healthy,
:01:13
Probably the best place
is Home Depot or any hardware store,
:01:17
You just walk up
to the cutest guy and say:
:01:21
''Do you know where l can get nailed?
l mean, nails?
:01:25
Pardon me,
l've been drinking all afternoon,''
:01:27
And that way he knows,
one, that you're easy,,,
:01:31
,,,and two, that you like to drink,
:01:35
l thought a great place to meet girls would
be night school where they teach English,
:01:39
Because these girls
would be from foreign lands,,,
:01:42
,,,and maybe still a little disoriented
from the journey,,,
:01:45
,,,and l would look attractive
because l speak English very goodly,
:01:49
But in the end,
it did not work out as l had hoped,
:01:52
l mean, basically, l was told to
take a hike in 1 4 languages,
:01:56
Where do you meet people?
l don't know, they're everywhere,
:02:01
Why, is there a problem?
:02:09
No, No way,
l'm not going out with this guy,
:02:12
Just call him, Say hello,
He's in my book club,
:02:15
-Why is there a woman here?
-lt's his wife,
:02:18
They're separated, but he didn't want
to Photoshop her out,,,
:02:21
,,,if you're not interested,
They are in Hawaii,
:02:24
lt's the Four Seasons,
This could be you in the photograph,
:02:27
Aloha,
:02:29
-Well, if you change your mind,
-l've got a picture too,
:02:31
ls that why you're all here?
The whole family?
:02:34
-Everyone has a picture for me?
-This is an intervention, Sarah,
:02:37
-He's great,
-A beautiful girl like you can't just give up,
:02:40
There's life after divorce,
:02:42
You were married to the same woman
for 45 years, Dad,
:02:44
-What do you know about divorce?
-Precious little, l admit,
:02:48
The black specter of two lives
torn asunder,
:02:51
Not helping, Dad,
:02:53
l wish your mother were here,
God rest her soul,
:02:55
-She'd know what to say,
-''Put on another pot of tea,''
:02:58
That's what she'd say,
The lrish answer to all problems,