:37:00
I'd like to see Grant's tomb
and the Statue of Liberty.
:37:03
You'll not only see those,
but before the evening's half through...
:37:07
you'll be leaning against
the Leaning Tower of Pisa...
:37:09
you'll mount Mount Everest.
:37:10
I'll show you the pyramids
and all the little pyramidees...
:37:13
leaping from sphinx to sphinx.
:37:15
Pal, how would you like to go on
a real old-fashioned binge?
:37:19
- Binge?
- Yeah, l mean the regain McCoy.
:37:21
You play saloon with me...
:37:23
and I'll introduce you to every wit,
nitwit and half-wit in New York.
:37:27
We'll go on a twister that'll make
Omar the soused philosopher of Persia...
:37:31
look like an anemic
on a goat's milk diet.
:37:34
- That oughta be fun, huh?
- Fun? Say--
:37:37
Listen, I'll take you
on a bender...
:37:40
that will live in your memory
as a thing of beauty and a joy forever.
:37:45
Boy? Boy, my headpiece!
:37:47
O Tempora! O Mores! O Bacchus!
:37:51
- Oh, you're drunk.
- Oh, you're right!
:37:54
- If we go with him, we'll see things.
- I guess we will.
:38:03
"'I play the tuba to help me think.'
:38:05
This is one of the many startling
statements made by Longfellow Deeds...
:38:08
New York's new Cinderella Man...
:38:10
who went out last night to prove
that his uncle, the late M.W. Semple...
:38:13
from whom he inherited
20 million dollars...
:38:15
was an amateur in the art of standing
the town on its cauliflower ear."
:38:20
"Cinderella Man."
That's sensational, Babe, sensational.
:38:24
Took some high-powered acting,
believe me.
:38:26
- Did it?
- I was the world's sweetest ingenue.
:38:28
Is he really that big a sap?
:38:31
He's the original.
There are no carbon copies of that one.
:38:34
"Cinderella Man." That'll stick to him
for the rest of his life.
:38:38
Can you imagine Cobb's face
when he reads this?
:38:42
If we could sell tickets,
we'd make a fortune.
:38:44
- How'd you get the picture?
- Had the boys follow us.
:38:47
Marvelous.
:38:48
"At 2:00 a.m.
Mr. Deeds tied up traffic...
:38:50
while he fed a bagful of donuts
to a horse.
:38:55
When asked why he was doing it
he replied...
:38:57
'To see how many donuts the horse would
eat before he asked for some coffee."'