1:04:01
...help another drowning man?
1:04:03
So you hung up on him.
1:04:06
And then that phone...
1:04:09
...started to ring again.
1:04:12
It rang and it rang
and it wouldn't stop ringing.
1:04:16
And I lay in that hospital bed,
unable to move or run from that sound.
1:04:21
It kept ringing louder and louder.
1:04:24
And the sound of that
was like Skipper screaming for help.
1:04:32
And I couldn't pick it up.
1:04:36
So that's when he killed himself?
1:04:42
Yes.
1:04:45
Because I let him down.
1:04:52
So that disgust with mendacity
is really disgust with myself.
1:04:56
When I hear that click I don't hear
the sound of that phone ringing anymore.
1:05:01
And I can stop thinking.
1:05:03
I'm ashamed!
1:05:05
That's why I'm a drunk.
When I'm drunk I can stand myself.
1:05:08
But the truth is always there
in the morning, isn't it?
1:05:12
And it's here right now.
1:05:15
You're just feeling sorry for yourself.
That's all it is. Self-pity!
1:05:19
You didn't kill Skipper. He killed himself.
1:05:21
You, Skipper and lots like you,
living in a kid's world...
1:05:24
...playing games, touchdowns,
no worries, no responsibilities.
1:05:28
Life ain't no damn football game.
1:05:31
Life ain't just a bunch of high spots.
1:05:34
You're a 30-year-old kid.
Soon you'll be a 50-year-old kid...
1:05:38
...pretending you hear cheers
when there ain't any.
1:05:40
Dreaming and drinking your life away.
1:05:43
Heroes in the real world...
1:05:44
...live 24 hours a day,
not just two hours in a game.
1:05:48
Mendacity! You won't--
1:05:54
You won't live with mendacity,
but you're an expert at it.
1:05:57
The truth is pain and sweat...