:33:01
and bring home
four of your hooker friends...
:33:03
to sleep with us at night
to stimulate heat.
:33:07
Look, I don't know
how you can own a business...
:33:09
and not be able to cash...
:33:11
this miserable pittance
of a welfare check is all.
:33:13
If I give you all my money...
:33:15
I'll have nothing left
to buy with.
:33:17
Oh, Christ,
then you are in luck, Morris.
:33:19
Look at this. Knowing of
your love for the unusual...
:33:22
I've brought you something
you won't be able to resist.
:33:24
-I know it.
-Resist?
:33:25
Believe me, I could resist.
:33:27
Just look at it, Morris--
the design, the gentle contours.
:33:30
Why, it's almost Louis Quinze
for Christ's sake.
:33:33
It's disgusting,
for Christ's sake.
:33:35
It's the type of item
that will sell so fast...
:33:38
you'll be pleading for more
inside of a week, believe me.
:33:43
It's been used. I can tell.
:33:45
What? Used?
By a little old lady.
:33:47
A one-owner shitter--
and genteel.
:33:49
That's gentile,
you stupid bastard.
:33:52
Don't get hosteel.
:33:53
That's "hostile."
:33:54
You're taking
the wrong approach, Morris.
:33:56
Now, some of my best friends
are Jewish.
:33:58
Do I look like
the Chase Manhattan Bank?
:34:00
You come in here with
out-of-money look in your face.
:34:03
Look like you got hit in
the head with a foul pitch...
:34:06
and you want to sell me this.
:34:08
But with inflation, the value
of a dollar going down...
:34:10
my expenses skyrocketing...
:34:12
Why, even this week, the price
of a decent circumcision...
:34:16
something I shudder
to think about.
:34:18
I agree with you there...
:34:19
but what's that got to do
with my toilet seat?
:34:25
That's the point, my friend.
:34:28
My old seder
used to say to me...
:34:30
"Morris, take a pickle.
It's made for eating."
:34:34
The thing you're holding
is made for shitting.
:34:37
It's simple logic.
:34:39
You could even be a Rockefeller.
:34:40
It's tough to find
a good pickle.
:34:46
Socioeconomically speaking,
you're absolutely correct, but--
:34:50
Look, Fritz...
:34:52
the pickles are beginning
to get to me.
:34:54
And these days, a soft stool
is too important to me...
:34:57
for something to quibble,
so I'll make you a deal.