:31:00
- But it's the same with us, Harry.
- What do you mean?
:31:03
I mean we've got two children,
and we've had sexual intercourse twice.
:31:08
That's not the point.
We could have it any time we wanted.
:31:11
- Really?
- And what's more, since we don't believe...
:31:14
in all that papist claptrap,
we can take precautions.
:31:18
What you mean, lock the door?
:31:19
No. I mean because we're members
of the Protestant Reformed Church...
:31:23
which successfully challenged
the autocratic power of the Papacy...
:31:27
in the mid-16th century, we can wear
little rubber devices to prevent issue.
:31:31
What do you mean?
:31:32
I could, if I wanted,
have sexual intercourse with you.
:31:34
Oh, yes, Harry.
:31:36
And, by wearing a rubber sheath
over my old fellow...
:31:39
I could ensure that when I came off,
you would not be impregnated.
:31:43
That's what being a Protestant's all about.
That's why it's the church for me.
:31:47
That's why it's the church
for anyone who respects the individual...
:31:50
and the individual's right
to decide for him or herself.
:31:53
When Martin Luther nailed his protest
up to the church door in 1517...
:31:58
he may not have realised
the full significance of what he was doing...
:32:01
but 400 years later, thanks to him...
:32:04
I can wear whatever I want
on my John Thomas.
:32:07
And Protestantism doesn't stop
at the simple condom.
:32:10
- Oh, no! I can wear French Ticklers if I want.
- You what?
:32:13
French Ticklers, black mambos,
crocodile ribs.
:32:16
Sheaths that are designed
not only to protect...
:32:19
but also to enhance
the stimulation of sexual congress.
:32:22
Have you got one?
:32:24
Have I got one? No, but I can go down
the road anytime I want...
:32:27
and walk into Harry's, and hold my head
up high and say, in a loud, steady voice:
:32:31
"Harry, I want you to sell me a condom.
:32:34
"In fact, today I think I'll have
a French Tickler, for I am a Protestant."
:32:38
- Why don't you?
- But they cannot.
:32:40
Because their church never made
the leap out of the Middle Ages...
:32:44
and the domination of
alien Episcopal supremacy.
:32:47
But despite the attempts
of Protestants...
:32:49
to promote the idea of sex for pleasure...
:32:51
children continue to multiply everywhere.