Better Off Dead...

- Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.

Your book on how to
pick up trashy women came today.

Tell me something.
What's a little boy like you
doing with big-boy smut like this?

Hi. I was just wondering...
I know that we don't
even know each other...

but I know that you were going out
with that girl Beth.

I can see that you're not
going out with her anymore...

and I was wondering if perhaps
I could just be with her...

go to the movies,
have a soda.

- Can I talk to you for a moment?
- Yeah.

Come in here and sit down,
please, young man.

- Look, I'm sorry about the garage.
- Let me give you the bottom line.

It would be entirely beneficial...
if you were to reenter
the sociological mainstream...

by reengaging in the ritual act of
dating members of the opposite sex.

I don't wanna date other girls.
I wanna date Beth.

I'm sorry to inform you that you are
going to start dating other girls.

- Starting tonight.
- Oh?

Tonight at 6:00,
you're picking up Joanne Greenwald.

- Your law partner's daughter?
- That's right.

The one with the big antenna
on her face?

Come on.