Gremlins 2: The New Batch

Just rereleased on video is Gremlins,
though I can't imagine why.

I know some people found it fun, but
I'd rather have root canal work done.

What's fun about a movie full of ugly,
mean-spirited monsters...

...who attack innocent people?
Are we so desperate for entertainment
that this trash passes for fun?

Wait a minute!
Look at this. I've been working on
making tomatoes tougher for shipping.

- That's terrific!
- Topnotch! How do they taste?

That's the best part. We've already
had calls from two airline chefs.

Oh, my gosh!
- Did somebody leave something out?
- Not I.

It's eating my vegetable medley.
- What's that noise?
- I think they're laughing.

- Reptiles don't laugh!
- They're not reptiles.

- Then what are they?
- A virus?

What on earth is going on?
I leave you alone, what do I find
when I get back? Chaos!

Is that the brain hormone
that creature's drinking?

Good boy. Nice boy.
There's a good creature.
Now, let's talk this over.

I can get you diseases.
You'd like that, wouldn't you?