Noises Off...
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1:14:00
But nothing could have prepared us
for the final horror.

1:14:06
Cleveland.
1:14:28
I'm something you'll never be,
and that's a star!

1:14:32
Your cockney accent sounds
like Dolly Parton.

1:14:35
Stay away from Freddy!
He never did anything to you!

1:14:39
- Garry was using you!
- Quiet!

1:14:44
Hold on! I'm coming!
Hold your horses. I'll be right there.

1:14:51
Hold on! I can't get sardines
off the floor and answer the phone.

1:14:55
I've only got one leg.
1:14:58
Hello?
1:15:00
Hello?
Yes, but there's no one here, love.

1:15:05
Mr Brent's not here now.
He lives in Spain.

1:15:08
Yes, he writes plays,
1:15:10
though why he wants to get mixed up
in plays, God knows.

1:15:14
He'd be safer in a snake pit.
No, she's in Spain, too.

1:15:19
They're all in Spain.
1:15:21
Am I in Spain? No, I'm not in Spain!
I'm in agony, that's where I am!

1:15:27
We haven't been on the road three
months and she's trying to kill me!

1:15:32
I'm standing with a plate of sardines
and she kicks me in the...

1:15:37
Where the hell are they?
If it's to do with renting...

1:15:42
- Selsdon!
- Selsdon?

1:15:44
- I can't find him.
- I'll find him.

1:15:48
No, they're next to the study
in the phone.

1:15:52
Squire, Squire, Hackham and...
Hold on!

1:15:56
I'm going to do something wrong here.
Oh, yes!

1:15:59
Always the same. As soon as
you've got too much on your plate,


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