:08:01
And, of course,
the Linear pocket pager, beeper...
:08:05
...garage-door opener combo.
:08:09
Give me the best one you have.
I'll never lose it again.
:08:25
I recently broke up with Jennifer,
my last girlfriend.
:08:29
I did it in a crowded restaurant.
:08:33
She just stared at me with that look:
"How can you pass me up?"
:08:37
I told her we weren't right,
all the stuff we both knew.
:08:41
I realized I was wrong, tried to get
back with her. She won't see me.
:08:45
Now she's with Tony.
:08:50
Tony knows my friend Bailey, who's
friends with Tony's other girl, Rita.
:08:54
Rita, who I broke up with
to go out with Jennifer.
:08:57
So do I tell Jennifer I know
Tony's going out with Rita...
:09:01
...or do I tell Rita I know
about Tony and Jennifer?
:09:04
Tony will tell Jennifer I was
dating Rita when I was with her.
:09:08
How does stuff get so complicated?
I don't know.
:09:12
Sometimes I wish it was as simple as
this postcard somebody sent me once.
:09:21
Isn't that great?
:09:27
I don't know. I think...
:09:30
Cliff! I'm talking here, man.
:09:35
I'm back to the beginning.
:09:37
My dad left home when I was 8.
He said to me:
:09:40
"Have fun. Stay single."
:09:44
I was 8.
:09:47
My mom's a teacher. She took me
to a doctor to learn about sex.
:09:51
He was from Boston.
:09:52
The father and the mother
have finally learned to come together.
:09:58
The father inserts his penis...