Loch Ness

See, that's my personal favourite,
the old triple-humper.

If you don't believe in it,
why did you ask me?

I'm sorry.
- Is there a shower?
- Aye.

Thank God.
- But there's no hot water.
- Why not?

- The dog used the last of it.
- I'm sorry?

Canis lupus used the last of the H2O.
He's clean as a whistle now.

No, wait a minute...
You're telling me that I'm paying
£90 a night, that's $140,

I don't get the breakfast I paid for,
and the dog gets my hot water?

I didn't know you were coming,
and I didn't ask you to stay.

There'll be plenty of hot water later.
There are your towels.

Thank you. Yes, the towels.
Look at these! Should they be
away from their mother?

I've seen the snow
in wintertime five feet.

And my old grandpappy,
four feet eleven.

We never saw him till March.
- That's terrible.
- Except for his hat.

- My old grandmother was pleased.
- I'll help you with that.

- I can manage, thanks!
- Sorry.

I wasn't suggesting 'cause you're
a woman you're not capable of...

You're more than capable of...
As well as being a woman.

Well, if you want to.
- What are you doing, Andy?
- I'm just pulling one for Duncan.

- On the self-serve pump.
- Stay your side of the bar, please!

I do apologise, Miss McFetridge.