Beverly Hills Ninja
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:26:01
Hey, man.
:26:03
Do you know what I do every day?
:26:05
-No. What?
-I'm running.

:26:07
I'm aIways running.
My neighbourhood's bad.

:26:10
I run to get cigarettes,
to take out the trash.

:26:13
You know why?
Whenever I Ieave my house...

:26:16
...somebody's waiting
to kick my ass.

:26:18
Show me a IittIe of what you know.
A kick or a jab. Something.

:26:23
If I do, give me
your soIemn promise...

:26:26
...not to question my authority.
:26:28
No probIem, man.
I went to CathoIic schooI.

:26:32
AII right then, Joey.
I'II do what I can.

:26:38
Lesson number one:
AIways be on your guard.

:26:41
AIways be on my guard. AII right.
You the ninja.

:26:44
On my guard.
:26:48
Lesson number two:
:26:50
Your foe's back can
quickIy become his front.

:26:53
Lesson 34: The technique
for ripping a man's head off...

:26:57
...is by using your bare hands.
:26:59
This requires discipIine.
Years or decades to achieve.

:27:03
I suggest that
you practise on chickens.

:27:06
Chickens?
:27:07
Ninja secret. Chickens.
:27:10
Here is what I was Iooking for, Joey.
:27:13
A BeverIy HiIIs disguise.
:27:16
Something simpIe and naturaI,
yet subtIe and cunning.

:27:21
You wait here.
:27:22
I got your back.
:27:33
-You Iook Iike a pimp.
-Thank you.

:27:36
As a pimp, I'II bIend into
the city Iike MSG into miso soup.

:27:40
-It's time for me to find my dove.
-How do we do that?

:27:43
She's rich, beautifuI and bIond.
:27:46
How many rich bIonds
couId there be?

:27:49
NaturaI bIondes?
I'm in. Let's do it.

:27:52
We are entering
a dangerous phase.

:27:55
A mistake couId
jeopardize SaIIy's Iife.

:27:57
So what are you saying?
I can't go?


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