Urban Legend
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:10:00
Bangs on every door.
:10:03
And every student
that answers their door...

:10:07
he takes that little knife,
and he cuts their throat...

:10:10
ear to ear.
:10:13
Yeah. He does away
with an entire floor...

:10:15
before finally stabbing himself...
:10:18
straight through the heart.
:10:22
And thus...
:10:24
the annual Omega Sigma Phi bash.
:10:28
So you have a frat party
to commemorate a massacre?

:10:30
You betcha.
:10:32
Let me get this straight.
:10:33
When this happened 25 years ago...
:10:36
you were a sophomore.
:10:41
That's funny.
:10:42
Well, it's a bullshit story you hear
on every campus in the northeast.

:10:46
Thank you.
l mean, where's the proof?

:10:48
You see, that's the thing.
:10:50
Pendleton knew damn well
that enrollment...

:10:53
would suffer permanently.
:10:54
So, in cahoots with the national
news media and various other powerful--

:10:59
Like Lee Harvey Oswald?
:11:01
Or is it Jack Ruby?
:11:03
No, l know who it was.
:11:05
lt was that F.B.l. guy who used to
prance around in women's underwear.

:11:08
He covered it all up.
:11:14
That's the news room.
l gotta go. Get a life.

:11:18
- Hey, Paul!
- Yeah.

:11:20
Before you go, if there's another
E. coli crisis in the cafeteria...

:11:23
l want you to have
the biggest, juiciest burger on me.

:11:26
l'd love to. That article
almost got me the student Pulitzer.

:11:31
- Bye, Paul.
- Bye, Paul.

:11:33
Know what his problem is?
:11:35
He can't stand any big story...
:11:37
without having his byline on it.
:11:40
He is such a babe.
:11:42
All right?
:11:43
Did it seem like
he was giving me the eye?

:11:46
lt was probably
the mirror behind us.

:11:49
Oh, damn.
:11:52
Should l ask him out anyway?
:11:56
lf Parker's story is true
and all those kids were murdered here...

:11:59
why haven't they torn down
Stanley Hall?


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