:03:00
Not, "Oh, shit, why
did I do it with that creep?"
:03:05
What?
:03:06
We've only been going out
two hours and 24 minutes.
:03:10
-Are you frigid?
-No.
:03:12
-Lesbian?
-No.
:03:14
You'll know what
to do with this then.
:03:17
I mean, I don't want much.
Just a bit of romance.
:03:20
Ciao, ice woman.
:03:24
No, bollocks. Strike that.
:03:25
I want a lot of romance.
Loads. I want the whole works.
:03:29
I want Mr. Right Bloke to
sweep me off my size fives...
:03:33
...and whisk me away on
a magic carpet ride of romance.
:03:37
I want a moonlit serenade.
:03:39
I want to see a blanket of stars
and hear soft words in my ear.
:03:43
I want to be flown head-on into a
massive, swirling vortex of emotion.
:03:48
Such a great word, isn't it?
:03:51
Vortex....
:03:53
You zapped his barcode
and it registered " no sale."
:03:56
No sweat. Don't win the lottery
unless you scratch a few cards.
:04:00
Maybe there is something wrong.
:04:03
l'm a 1 7-year-old virgin.
:04:06
lt's so much easier if you're a bloke.
:04:08
Just orbiting the Earth like
a lunar module looking for a docking.
:04:12
Maybe l should be
more like Hoover. More willing.
:04:16
Strap a mattress to
your back and call yourself " Futon."
:04:28
Isabelle Jasmine Clarkson.
Also known as "Shake and Vac. "
:04:32
Or simply, "The Hoover."
:04:35
She may not be
the sharpest tool in the shed.
:04:38
But what she missed out
on brains she made up in hormones.
:04:41
She grew breasts at 9.
:04:43
She's a walking, talking,
hip-swishing man magnet!
:04:46
No man has ever said no to Hoover.
:04:48
Her technique? To give them exactly
what they want, and then some.