1:36:01
-Uh-huh.
-{Sirens}
1:36:02
Holy shit, the cops.
We gotta get out of here.
1:36:04
No, no, no.
l`m tired of running.
1:36:07
Oh, Marshal.
Hey, you awaKe?
1:36:11
WaKe up, Marshal.
1:36:12
-Oh.
-Are you OK?
1:36:14
Oh, my God, l`m paralyzed!
1:36:17
That monKey shot me in the ass
and paralyzed me!
1:36:20
Oh, sweet irony!
1:36:23
You`re not paralyzed.
lt was just a tranquilizer.
1:36:25
Oh, Jesus! Ow!
1:36:28
TranKed by a little monKey!
1:36:31
My friends in the Bureau...
1:36:32
are never gonna let me
hear the end of this.
1:36:34
You have friends in the FBl?
1:36:36
Uh-huh. They all made it in,
but l failed the exam.
1:36:39
Why the hell else
do you thinK l became...
1:36:41
a Federal Wildlife Marshal?
1:36:42
l`ll tell you why!
Because l`m a joKe!
1:36:45
JUSTlCE: Maybe not.
1:36:47
l can maKe you a deal that
will get you into the FBl...
1:36:49
regardless of test scores.
1:36:51
What Kind of deal?
1:36:53
You get the charges dropped
against Jay and Silent Bob...
1:36:55
and say
you never found the ape.
1:36:57
ln exchange, l will give you
the diamonds we stole...
1:36:59
and turn in Missy, Chrissy,
Sissy, and myself.
1:37:01
But l want a reduced sentence.
1:37:03
You`d be willing to do that?
1:37:08
For him,
l`d be willing to do anything.
1:37:17
l`m an international jewel thief
who`s facing a jail sentence.
1:37:20
That`s all right.
l`m a junKie with a monKey.
1:37:23
lf l go to prison,
will you wait for me?
1:37:25
l don`t Know.
1:37:26
Will you fucK me
when you get out?
1:37:34
Don`t change the subject.
Will we fucK when you get out?
1:37:37
Snoogans.
1:37:43
{Pbbt}
1:37:46
Wow, there`s a lot of love
in the room.
1:37:49
Regardless of what
you may have heard...
1:37:51
l do not Kiss guys.
1:37:53
OK. Play it cool, hotshot.
1:37:57
{Both laugh}