:08:01
- ... Skynyrd, Def Lepp-
- All right.
:08:03
Don't make me
call your probey officer.
:08:06
And riddle me this:
:08:08
Other than the fact that you dig
looking like Jane Fonda in Klute...
:08:12
...why don't you cut the wig now?
:08:16
Well, yeah. I guess I could do that.
:08:20
Zander just asked this Joe Dirt
why he doesn't cut the wig.
:08:23
You can tell he's never
thought of that.
:08:25
Except for the ratty stache
and the pork chops...
:08:28
...you're pretty clean-shaven for
a kid who lives in a trash can. No?
:08:31
I don't need to shave because it don't
grow in right here and here.
:08:35
You're telling me you were
so ingrained with white-trash DNA...
:08:39
...your facial hair actually grows in
on its own all white-trashy like that?
:08:44
I don't know what you're saying,
but that's what's going on, yeah.
:08:48
So back to the story here.
You're on your own...
:08:53
I'm just camping out or whatever...
:08:56
...and this goes on for years until
one night, something amazing happened.
:09:03
Man, a shooting star.
:09:06
I got to make a wish.
:09:08
I wish I knew what happened that
one day at that Grand Canyon place.
:09:26
It's a meteorite!
:09:28
Whoa, check it out. That's cool.
Oh, man, look at you.
:09:32
You're probably made of precious
metal, and everyone'll want you.
:09:35
But you want to be with me! Right on!
:09:38
You're Joe Meteorite,
and I'm Joe Dirt!
:09:44
Here on earth,
we call this place the town.
:09:48
A town is a place where everyone
hates you. Kids try to beat you up.
:09:53
- Oh, yes. It's so flat.
- Awesome.
:09:55
This is going to be awesome.
Holy crap, ladies.
:09:59
Hey, junior dirt bag.
You talking to your rock?