Adaptation
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:00:36
"D"o I have an original thought
in my head? My bald head?

:00:39
Maybe if I were happier,
my hair wouldn't be falling out.

:00:42
Life is short. I need
to mak e the most of it.

:00:46
Today is the first day
of the rest of my life.

:00:50
I'm a walking clich.
:00:52
I really need to go to the doctor
and have my leg check ed.

:00:54
There's something wrong.
A bump.

:00:56
The dentist called again.
I'm way overdue.

:00:58
If I stopped putting things off,
I'd be happier.

:01:02
All I do is sit on my fat ass.
If my ass wasn't fat, I'd be happier.

:01:05
I wouldn't have to wear these shirts
with the tails out all the time.

:01:08
Lik e that's fooling anyone.
:01:10
Fat ass. I should start jogging again.
Five miles a day.

:01:14
Really do it this time.
Maybe rock climbing.

:01:17
I need to turn my life around.
:01:19
What do I need to do?
I need to fall in love.

:01:21
I need to have a girlfriend.
:01:23
I need to read more,
improve myself.

:01:25
What if I learned Russian
or something?

:01:27
Or took up an instrument?
I could speak Chinese.

:01:30
I would be the screenwriter who
speaks Chinese. And plays the oboe.

:01:34
That would be cool.
I should get my hair cut short.

:01:36
Stop trying to fool everyone
into thinking I have a full head of hair.

:01:40
How pathetic is that?
Just be real. Confident.

:01:43
Isn't that what women
are attracted to?

:01:45
Men don't have to be attractive.
:01:47
But that's not true,
especially these days.

:01:49
Almost as much pressure on men
as there is on women these days.

:01:52
Why should I be made to feel I have
to apologize for my existence?

:01:55
Maybe it's my brain chemistry.
:01:57
Maybe that's what's wrong with me.:
bad chemistry.

:01:59
All my problems and anxiety can be
reduced to a chemical imbalance...


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