:01:00
Lesbian.
:01:03
She gave me her number. It's been three days.
:01:06
I saw Swingeer. I know how these things work.
:01:08
Hello, and welcome to AOL Moviefone,
:01:11
I stay up nights trying to figure out
why she said she'd call and didn't.
:01:15
Maybe she wanted to call and that's why
she said she was going to call, but...
:01:20
"Christina"
:01:24
"Christina"
:01:27
You know, there ought to be
some kind of a signal...
:01:31
...to let us guys know
when we are talking to a lesbian.
:01:37
So we don't waste our time.
:01:40
Prolonged impotence is very common
after a breakup.
:01:44
Lots of men suffer from it.
:01:46
They just don't talk about it.
Not like me, gabbing away. Gab, gab.
:01:50
But, even still,
because she said she was going to call...
:01:54
...she should've called
to say she wasn't going to call...
:01:57
...and I would've thanked her for calling...
:01:59
All right. Okay .
:02:02
I apologize for saying she was a lesbian.
:02:05
It's not true.
:02:07
My male ego got bruised and I lashed out.
I'm sorry.
:02:12
I'm not used to being blown off, that's all.
:02:15
I'm sure she wasn't trying to hurt me on purpose.
:02:19
I know deep down inside she's scared
and lonely just like everyone else.
:02:25
She'll settle down though,
once she finds the right man.
:02:28
Or woman .
:02:30
Maybe has a little boxed lunch at the Y.
:02:33
Jeez, I'm sorry. Did I say it again?
You're goddamn right I said it again.
:02:38
Why don't you shave your head, Christina,
and take up women's golf?
:02:41
Why don't you go to the Depot.
Lots of carpet you can munch on there.
:02:51
At least I don't get that dizzy,
head-spinning nausea as much as I used to.
:02:55
Hooray!