:09:00
Damian, you've truly
out-gayed yourself.
:09:05
Here. This map is gonna
be your guide to North Shore.
:09:08
Now, where you sit in
the cafeteria is crucial
:09:11
because you got everybody there.
:09:13
You got your freshmen,
ROTC guys,
:09:15
preps, JV jocks,
:09:19
Asian nerds,
:09:21
cool Asians,
:09:23
varsity jocks,
:09:25
unfriendly black hotties,
:09:28
girls who eat their feelings,
:09:30
girls who don't eat anything,
:09:32
desperate wannabes,
:09:34
burnouts,
:09:36
sexually active band geeks,
:09:38
the greatest people
you will ever meet
:09:41
and the worst.
Beware of The Plastics.
:09:47
Hey. We're doing a lunchtime
survey of new students.
:09:49
Can you answer a few questions?
:09:51
- OK.
- Is your muffin buttered?
:09:54
What?
:09:57
Would you like us to assign
someone to butter your muffin?
:10:00
- My what?
- Is he bothering you?
:10:02
Jason, why are you such a skeez?
:10:05
I'm just being friendly.
:10:07
You were supposed
to call me last night.
:10:08
Jason. You do not come to a party
at my house with Gretchen
:10:12
and then scam on some poor, innocent
girl right in front of us three days later.
:10:15
She's not interested.
:10:17
Do you wanna have sex with him?
:10:19
- No, thank you.
- Good. So it's settled.
:10:22
So you can go shave your back now.
:10:24
Bye, Jason.
:10:26
Bitch.
:10:28
Wait. Sit down.
:10:32
Seriously, sit down.
:10:37
Why don't I know you?
:10:39
I'm new. I just moved here from Africa.
:10:42
- What?
- I used to be home-schooled.
:10:44
Wait. What?
:10:46
- My mom taught me at home...
- No, no.
:10:48
I know what home-school is.
I'm not retarded.
:10:50
So you've actually never been
to a real school before?
:10:53
Shut up.
:10:56
Shut up.
:10:58
- I didn't say anything.
- Home-schooled.