The 40 Year Old Virgin
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:05:00
And then, by the time
I was done...

:05:01
I just really didn't feel
like eating it.

:05:03
I can imagine.
And I didn't have any bread.

:05:06
So, you know,
it was pretty good.
It was a good weekend.

:05:10
Sounds pretty awesome.
Yeah, it was fine.

:05:12
Sounds really fun.
:05:15
Cool.
Cool.

:05:16
Cool, cool.
:05:21
Hey, Paula.
Yeah.

:05:23
I gotta tell you something.
I'm really excited about it.

:05:25
For the first time today,
I woke up...

:05:29
I came to the store,
and I feel confident
to say to you...

:05:33
that if you don't take
this Michael McDonald DVD...

:05:36
that you've been playing
for two years straight, off...

:05:38
I'm going to kill everyone
in the store...

:05:40
and put a bullet
in my brain.

:05:42
David, what do you suggest
we play?
I don't care. Anything.

:05:46
I would rather watch
Beautician and the Beast.

:05:49
I would rather listen
to Fran Drescher
for eight hours...

:05:51
than have to listen
to Michael McDonald.

:05:53
Nothing against him,
but if I hear Yah Mo B There
one more time...

:05:57
I'm gonna yah mo
burn this place
to the ground.

:05:59
You're such a smart ass.
Get back on the floor.

:06:04
[Garbled]
Fuck you.

:06:06
[Clears throat]
:06:07
This is a great TV.
Nothing beats a plasma.

:06:10
What are you doing?
That's my customer.

:06:11
It certainly is not.
When I came upon her,
she was unattended.

:06:14
No, that's my...
Wait.

:06:16
Go to the checkout there.
Pick up there, please.

:06:18
She was unattended
because I went to the back...

:06:20
to get the brochure
that she requested.

:06:22
I apologize,
but it's too late.

:06:24
The transaction
has been completed.

:06:25
Then you're gonna give me
half the commission.

:06:27
You'll receive
none of the commission.

:06:29
I need to talk to Paula.
This is crazy.

:06:30
This is bullshit.
:06:31
Every time I make a sale,
you go crying to Paula.

:06:33
How about Jesse Jackson?
Old Jesse needs a cause.

:06:37
Sick of you poaching
my customers.

:06:38
I'm sick of your
crybaby bullshit.

:06:40
You wanna take this
shit outside? Just take it
outside and squash it?

:06:43
Let's stay inside,
so everybody can see
what a pussy you have, okay?

:06:46
Because when I remove
the blade I keep in my boot
from its sheath...

:06:50
I can't return it
until it has spilled blood.

:06:53
Look, listen to me.
You are fucking
with the wrong nigger.

:06:56
Hey! You're fucking with
the wrong sun-nigger, okay?


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