The 40 Year Old Virgin
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:04:02
We get there,
and, you know, we think
it's gonna be awesome...

:04:05
and it is not as cool
as it sounds like
it would be, man.

:04:09
It's kind of gross.
Yeah.

:04:11
You think,
"A woman fucking a horse"...

:04:13
and you get there
and it's...

:04:15
a woman fucking a horse.
Yeah.

:04:17
It was really
giving it to her.

:04:19
And you know what...
:04:20
to be honest, I felt
bad for her. We all
just felt bad for her.

:04:23
Yeah.
Kind of felt bad
for the horse.

:04:24
Wow, that's something.
So what did you get up to?

:04:29
You know, I just kind
of hung out. I was...

:04:32
God, Friday,
when I went home...

:04:34
I really wanted
an egg-salad sandwich.

:04:36
And I was just obsessing
about it and I was like:

:04:38
"Man, I'm gonna
make one of those."

:04:40
So Saturday I went out
and I got, like,
a dozen eggs...

:04:44
and I boiled them all
and then I just...

:04:47
I spent, I don't know,
probably three hours...

:04:52
like, three-and-a-half hours
making...

:04:53
you know, the mayonnaise
and the onions and paprika...

:04:57
and, you know,
all the accoutrement.

:05:00
And then, by the time
I was done...

:05:01
I just really didn't feel
like eating it.

:05:03
I can imagine.
And I didn't have any bread.

:05:06
So, you know,
it was pretty good.
It was a good weekend.

:05:10
Sounds pretty awesome.
Yeah, it was fine.

:05:12
Sounds really fun.
:05:15
Cool.
Cool.

:05:16
Cool, cool.
:05:21
Hey, Paula.
Yeah.

:05:23
I gotta tell you something.
I'm really excited about it.

:05:25
For the first time today,
I woke up...

:05:29
I came to the store,
and I feel confident
to say to you...

:05:33
that if you don't take
this Michael McDonald DVD...

:05:36
that you've been playing
for two years straight, off...

:05:38
I'm going to kill everyone
in the store...

:05:40
and put a bullet
in my brain.

:05:42
David, what do you suggest
we play?
I don't care. Anything.

:05:46
I would rather watch
Beautician and the Beast.

:05:49
I would rather listen
to Fran Drescher
for eight hours...

:05:51
than have to listen
to Michael McDonald.

:05:53
Nothing against him,
but if I hear Yah Mo B There
one more time...

:05:57
I'm gonna yah mo
burn this place
to the ground.

:05:59
You're such a smart ass.
Get back on the floor.


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