:07:06
Thank you for coming out.
:07:07
Don't let the lights and cameras
throw y'all.
:07:09
We filming a movie here tonight
and y'all gonna be in this shit.
:07:16
Except only I'm getting paid
for the motherfucker.
:07:21
Every now and then
I take a joke too far.
:07:22
That's why I haven't been
on the road the last three years.
:07:25
Did y'all see Delirious?
:07:29
ln Delirious, I was making fun
out of a lot of entertainers too.
:07:32
That's when I got scared.
I did some jokes about Mr. T.
:07:35
And Mr. T was gonna fuck Ed up.
He was...
:07:37
And I was scared,
because y'all seen Mr. T.
:07:40
He don't look like, you know,
like he can't fight.
:07:42
He looks like he can
whip some ass, right?
:07:45
And I was petrified. I would walk
at parties and people say:
:07:47
"Yo, man, Mr. T was just here
looking for you."
:07:51
He was walking up
to people saying:
:07:52
"I'm gonna whip Eddie Murphy's ass
when I see him."
:07:55
Then I watched his show,
because I didn't know him,
:07:58
to see what kind of guy he was,
:07:59
and the character on the show
ain't too bright.
:08:01
So I figured if he came up to me,
I could use the Jedi mind trick on him.
:08:05
Mr. T walk up and go, "I heard
you did some jokes about me."
:08:07
"No, you didn't."
"Maybe I didn't."
:08:14
"I'm gonna go beat up the fool
that told me them lies."
:08:17
I'd be at parties,
hear he was looking for me,
:08:19
I would just leave.
I don't wanna fight Mr. T.
:08:22
Then I found out Michael Jackson
was looking for me. I was like...
:08:24
When Mike...
My manager called me up and said:
:08:27
"Yo, man, Michael Jackson is mad."
I was like, "So?"
:08:32
You know, because I'd fuck Mike up.
You know, Mike...
:08:37
Mike don't weigh but a buck-oh-five,
you know.
:08:40
I bust that ass on Mike. I was looking
for him, but my manager said:
:08:43
"We don't know everything
about Michael.
:08:45
"He might be this bad motherfucker
behind closed doors.
:08:47
"He's a recluse. Behind closed doors,
he might be completely different."
:08:51
And I'd be at a party and have
Michael walk up to me one day
:08:53
and it'd be like this:
:08:57
"Can I talk to you for a minute?