Eddie Murphy Raw

Man, you know what's real scary
is that American women in the '80s
have become very business-conscious.

Y'all the most resourceful
and the most business-smart
women on the planet. Now, in the '80s.

And it would be an asset to us,
as American men,

if you weren't so vindictive.
Because the two don't match.
Then, what's really fucked up,
is y'all the most loving people.

American women
are all off into this romance

and they genuinely
fall in love with you.

Now, love and money do not mix.
The shit don't mix.

Especially if you got
a business-smart woman...

You go up and say, "I never met
anybody like you before."

"I never met anyone like you."
"Why don't we be together."

"Will you marry me?"
"I thought you'd never ask."

"Before we get married, why don't
you sign this prenuptial agreement."

"What do you mean,
a prenuptial agreement?"

"That's a contract that stipulates
if we ever break up,

"you take what you had
and I take what I had."

"First of all, I don't give a fuck who
you are and what you have, OK?

"You got a lot of motherfucking nerve
by asking me to sign a contract.

"There's nothing a man can do
for me that I can't do for myself.

"You got a whole lot of...
I love you.

"Telling me to sign a contract
to show that I love you?

"lf I need something, I can go to my
family. My family takes care of me."

And men hear all that shit
and we be like this, "OK.

"We don't need no contract."
And you don't get a contract
and get married without one

and the shit don't work out
and you break up a year later.

She's sitting around
in the kitchen by herself, mad,

trying to figure out a way
to get even with your ass.

"I can't believe that motherfucker
did this to me!

"After all the shit I did...
"All the things I did for that
motherfucker, he do this to me?

"Him and his fat bitch
can kiss my ass!

"I don't give a shit about
either one of them.

"I don't want shit from him or her
and I don't care.

"You know something? You know
what I should...? You know...?

"I'll take half his shit!"
And they'll get it.