:07:01
- Hey, in the storeroom? Kids?
- Zimmy, they won't die.
:07:05
In fact, that'll be our motto:
"They won't die."
:07:08
I'll count the money. Rocky, make sure
the horse gets back to Knott's Berry Farm.
:07:12
Private First Class Holbrook, Walter T,
reporting in for duty, Sergeant!
:07:15
Sarge, Holbrook is a tech-school terror.
:07:17
First in his class,
motor-vehicle maintenance.
:07:20
A real live wrench-turner
in the motor pool?
:07:22
It's so crazy, it just might work.
I'll introduce you to the boys and girls.
:07:27
- (Bilko sniffs)
- What's the matter, Sarge?
:07:29
Don't you smell it? It's money.
:07:35
This is Sgt Henshaw and Sgt Barbella.
You'll see them about dances, raffles.
:07:39
You'll get your tickets
through them. They run the shop.
:07:42
So if you need stationery, magazines...
But not magazine subscriptions.
:07:46
See Morales about that. Towels...
:07:47
- Towels? Doesn't the army issue towels?
- Army? Get him a set of towels.
:07:51
The fluffy ones.
The introductory price. Come on.
:07:55
Place your bets, ladies and gentlemen.
:07:59
This is Dino Paparelli.
You're gonna laugh, you're gonna cry.
:08:02
You're gonna love
this scrappy little Italian.
:08:04
- Hiya.
- Sam Fender. His motto in life is simple:
:08:07
..."An indictment is not a conviction."
- Damn straight.
:08:10
That's manly talk. Mickey Zimmerman.
:08:13
Tragically, Zimmerman was born
without a personality.
:08:16
- Hello.
- Luis Clemente.
:08:18
This guy is smart, very smart.
He has an IQ.
:08:21
- Hello.
- See what I mean?
:08:24
Tony Morales. The only thing
you need to know about him...
:08:27
...is he doesn't take showers
because it fogs up the mirror.
:08:30
Finally, the man of the hour, the master
of disaster, the king of the universe -
:08:35
...look out, girls, he hates to dine alone -
Private Duane Doberman!
:08:39
Aw, Sarge.
:08:40
Doberman doesn't take showers either,
but for a much more frightening reason.
:08:46
My orders, Sergeant.
:08:49
Everything seems to be in order.
Henshaw will take your bags.
:08:52
Don't worry, he's bonded. Got a licence?
:08:54
- A driver's licence?
- We can make one up.
:08:56
- Henshaw, get the camera!
- No, no. I have a licence. It's right here.