:08:02
You're gonna love
this scrappy little Italian.
:08:04
- Hiya.
- Sam Fender. His motto in life is simple:
:08:07
..."An indictment is not a conviction."
- Damn straight.
:08:10
That's manly talk. Mickey Zimmerman.
:08:13
Tragically, Zimmerman was born
without a personality.
:08:16
- Hello.
- Luis Clemente.
:08:18
This guy is smart, very smart.
He has an IQ.
:08:21
- Hello.
- See what I mean?
:08:24
Tony Morales. The only thing
you need to know about him...
:08:27
...is he doesn't take showers
because it fogs up the mirror.
:08:30
Finally, the man of the hour, the master
of disaster, the king of the universe -
:08:35
...look out, girls, he hates to dine alone -
Private Duane Doberman!
:08:39
Aw, Sarge.
:08:40
Doberman doesn't take showers either,
but for a much more frightening reason.
:08:46
My orders, Sergeant.
:08:49
Everything seems to be in order.
Henshaw will take your bags.
:08:52
Don't worry, he's bonded. Got a licence?
:08:54
- A driver's licence?
- We can make one up.
:08:56
- Henshaw, get the camera!
- No, no. I have a licence. It's right here.
:09:00
My wallet.
:09:02
Oh, here it is. Empty.
It's in your hat, isn't it?
:09:06
Good boy. Oh. Oh, there must be six...
no, seven hundred dollars in here. Good.
:09:13
Well, you can start with this.
The colonel's car.
:09:15
- OK, what's wrong with it?
- It's the odometer.
:09:18
It says 12,000 miles,
and it should say 11,000 miles.
:09:22
Tony drove it to Lake Tahoe
to go to his grandmother's funeral.
:09:25
- I'm sorry.
- When I say that...
:09:28
...I mean "visit his niece". And
when I say "niece", I mean lady friend?
:09:34
Look. I'm winking. Look at my eye.
:09:37
- You want me to turn that back?
- (gasps) Yes.
:09:40
- I can't do that, Sergeant.
- "Can't"! He said "can't"!
:09:44
Sarge, are you all right?
:09:46
Hey, man, "can't" is a four-letter word
in this platoon.
:09:49
I cannot violate regulations,
unless it's an order...
:09:52
...in which case I would have to ask
Master Sergeant Bilko to sign said order.
:09:56
I'm asking you to do Tony here a favour.
We're all like family here.
:09:59
Any one of these men
would take a bullet for you.