Keeping the Faith

It's a little more com-- It's
a little more complicated than that.

Oh, yes, it always is. Everybody thinks
their story is the one with the twist.

But let me tell you,
in my experience it's--

- Holy shit.
- Exactly.

- This I've got to hear.
- No, look, uh, it's a long story.

And I know you're ver--
I know you're very busy...

and I don't really feel
like swapping stories...

- Wait, wait, wait. No, no, no, wait.
- if you want to know the truth.

Okay, now tell me, Father, how long
has it been since your last drink?

Um, it's been about a minute and a half
since my last drink.

Of course.
Now, what about these kids?

Okay, um--
- Well, you see the one on the right?
- Mmm.

- The cu-- The cute one?
- Mm-hmm.

That's me.
- That's very cute.
- Brian Finn.

Paulie Chopra.
Okay, well-- Now, you see
this kid on the left?

- Mmm.
- That was my best friend Jake.

- He's a priest too?

No, um, as it--
as it turns out, Jake's a rabbi.

Come on. A priest and a rabbi?
I think I've heard this one.

No, look, I've heard all those, and,
trust me, you have not heard this one.

Okay? So there's this priest and
this rabbi, and they're best friends.

- Mmm.
- But before they were
a priest and a rabbi...

they both knew this girl.
- Ah, the girl.
- Yeah.

- Who's the girl?
- That's Anna Reilly.

Reilly? Let me guess.
She became a nun?

Not quite. Not quite.
See, we all met in the sixth grade
at P.S. 84 right here in Manhattan.

I think I already knew Jake,
and then we both met Anna.