:30:00
[audience laughing]
:30:01
Ooh.
:30:03
Actually, uh, truth be told,
no one knows
where he is right now.
:30:06
A lot of people
are concerned.
:30:07
[audience laughing]
:30:10
I don't know
why that's funny.
:30:16
God, I'm going to be honest,
I--I didn't plan on
speaking tonight.
:30:18
I--I was-- I was
actually hoping that
:30:21
my--my assistant coach
would be here,
:30:24
uh, to kind of...
:30:25
[audience murmuring]
:30:28
Ladies and gentlemen,
I would like to introduce
Mike Ditka.
:30:32
[audience cheering]
:30:34
It's Mike Ditka, everyone!
:30:38
Say a few words.
:30:40
Thanks, Paul,
thanks, everybody.
It's--It's great to be here
:30:42
and, uh, gonna have
a lot of fun tonight.
:30:44
Paul's got the Tigers
on the move.
:30:45
All right!
:30:47
You live long enough,
you see everything.
:30:49
Iron Mike and Aluminum Phil
coaching the Tigers.
:30:53
[audience laughing]
:30:55
I couldn't really hear you.
:30:57
My Super Bowl ring
was making too much noise.
:31:00
Ooh.
:31:02
You see it, Dad?
Right there, Dad.
That was a great one.
:31:05
Read it and weep.
:31:07
[audience applauding]
:31:09
Ditka is a great coach,
we understand that,
but he's a football coach.
:31:12
Understand?
Right.
:31:13
And we are
still losing, Phil.
:31:15
Okay, I understand
your concern about our record,
:31:18
but with me
it's not about win-lose.
:31:20
We are going to win one game
eventually, right?
:31:22
Well, we've had
a rocky start,
:31:24
but with
a strong team effort,
we will win some
:31:28
I think.
:31:30
Remember,
there's no "l" in team.
:31:32
But there is an "l"
in win.
:31:34
There is an "l" in win.
:31:35
Hey, wait.
:31:36
Uh, parents,
Honey.
:31:37
I didn't see you step up
when the team was in need.
:31:40
Okay.
Okay.
:31:41
Phil is not
the greatest coach
in the world,
:31:43
I'll give you that,
but at least he's trying.
:31:45
I can defend myself,
please.
:31:46
You think he enjoys losing
week after week,
:31:48
in front of his own son?
:31:49
You're making it worse.
You're making it worse.
:31:51
What's with the birds?
That was weird.
:31:53
I've got my hands full
with Hunter.
I don't need a bird.
:31:56
Okay, you know what?
You got me. All right?
:31:58
The finches were
a bad idea.
:31:59
And I wasn't going to
say this, but I think
some of them have salmonella.