The 40 Year Old Virgin
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:15:00
What's up?
Cal, good morning.

:15:07
(Haziz)
Hey, Andy.
Hey.

:15:09
We're gonna have to get you
some punani.

:15:11
[Both guffawing]
:15:13
Andy, it's going down,
partner. We're gonna be...

:15:17
[moaning]
:15:19
This for you, partner,
this for you.

:15:21
Waves of them coming at you
on Friday, Saturday.

:15:24
By Sunday,
your nuts gonna be drained.

:15:27
Hey, Andy, don't let him
bother you. It's okay
not to have sex.

:15:31
Not everybody
is a pussy magnet.

:15:33
What are you? 25?
I'm 40.

:15:37
Holy shit, man.
You've got to get on that.

:15:40
Life isn't about sex.
Life is about children
and passion.

:15:45
Yeah.
:15:46
And spirit.
Yeah, life's about passion.

:15:48
It's not about fucking
and balls and pussy.

:15:51
It's about love.
It's about people.

:15:55
It's about connection.
It's all about connections.

:15:58
It's not about cock
and ass and tits
and butthole pleasures.

:16:02
It's not about
butthole pleasures at all.

:16:04
It's not about
this rusty trombone
and dirty Sanchez.

:16:07
Please stop.
And Cincinnati bowtie.

:16:10
And your pussy juice cocktail
and this shit-stained balls.

:16:15
Mooj, just please stop.
Just relax...

:16:17
All right.
That's enough, party's over.

:16:19
Let the virgin
get back to work.

:16:25
Andy!
:16:27
Andy, come on.
We were just kidding.

:16:29
Pointless.
:16:30
Andy, nobody cares
that you're a virgin.

:16:33
Don't be such a baby.
:16:35
They were just having fun.
They didn't mean anything.

:16:37
Get away from me, David.
Wait a minute.

:16:39
Stop following me!
Hold up.

:16:45
Hold on.
I'm gonna have to
quit my job now.

:16:46
You don't have to
quit your job.

:16:48
You know what, I don't wanna
go out with you guys.

:16:50
Fine.
Okay? I don't need your help.

:16:51
Okay, fine, you don't
have to go out with us
if you don't want.

:16:54
You know what,
I respect women,
I love women.

:16:57
I respect them so much
that I completely
stay away from them.


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