The 40 Year Old Virgin
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:12:03
Okay.
:12:04
You know, Javier...
:12:07
before he made
passionate yet gentle love
to me for the first time...

:12:13
he serenaded me with
a beautiful old Guatemalan
love song.

:12:17
Really, that's...
:12:19
That sounds nice.
:12:22
**[singing in Spanish]
:12:49
Okay.
:12:52
My goodness.
:12:54
I think we better
get back to work.
Yeah.

:12:56
Yeah, I better go
back to work.
Yeah.

:12:58
So, okay.
All right.

:13:00
So, you mull it over
and I'll talk to you soon.

:13:02
All right, I will.
Thank you.
Okay.

:13:06
[Gasps]
:13:09
What's up, dawg?
What happened?
How was the date with Trish?

:13:12
It was a disaster.
Really?

:13:15
Yes. I've never been
more embarrassed in my life.

:13:18
Couldn't get the
condoms to work.

:13:20
And one of them
exploded on my balls.

:13:23
And then her kid
walked in the room.

:13:25
Wait. Hold up.
:13:26
She was hiding the kid
from you, dawg?

:13:27
You know what,
it doesn't matter...

:13:29
because it was going downhill
straight from there.

:13:31
Listen, you don't want
no baby-daddy drama.

:13:33
Trust me on this one,
all right?

:13:35
For all you know,
he in prison right now.

:13:37
Let's say y'all
living together.

:13:38
Next thing you know,
you the one going on the
1st and the 15th...

:13:41
to pick up the
government check.

:13:42
What if he got boys
that's on the outside...

:13:45
and they stalking you?
:13:46
You see what I'm saying?
You got to think, partner...

:13:48
What the fuck
are you talking about?

:13:50
Here's what you do.
You tell her you're a virgin.

:13:52
You test her
with this shit, okay?

:13:54
Here, tell me. Tell me.
This is how it's gonna go.
Tell me.

:13:57
I'm a virgin.
Sweet.

:13:59
I like that because
you don't have chlamydia.


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