Blue Collar Comedy Tour: The Movie
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:38:06
I can hear her and her partner talking
in Chinese. I don't speak Chinese.

:38:09
And then they start laughing.
I'm like, "Oh, my God!

:38:13
They're filming this."
:38:17
She comes in at the half-hour mark.
I think she'll take the needles out.

:38:20
No. She puts a cotton ball
on each of the ones in my legs...

:38:23
...Iights it on fire and leaves the room!
:38:26
Now I'm freaking out
because all I can see...

:38:29
...is smoke drifting up from between
my legs, and I cannot inhale it. Okey-dokey?

:38:38
Finally, at the hour mark, she comes in,
she takes the needles out and she goes:

:38:43
"You come back for another treatment."
I said, "Well, let's just book that right now.

:38:48
After that, I'll schedule a prostate exam.
Just be a big day for me."

:38:54
I put my ball cap on.
I'm gonna go home and take a shower.

:38:56
I've sweated through this whole ordeal.
:38:58
I'm standing in the bathroom in front
of the mirror. I took my cap off and I went:

:39:02
She left the needle in my head!
:39:12
I took my family
on an RV trip last summer.

:39:14
I thought RV stood for
"recreational vehicle." No.

:39:16
It stands for "ruins vacations."
:39:20
I had never driven one of these things.
Dear God, It's 35 feet long, 8 feet wide...

:39:24
...and got two mirrors that stick out
three feet on each side.

:39:27
Good Lord, I was like a passenger
trying to land a 747.

:39:31
I'm weaving all over the road.
:39:34
I'm getting flipped off by kids
in car seats, all right?

:39:39
Don't know why they put a reverse on these
dumb things. I never learned to back it up.

:39:44
If I pulled into a Quickie Mart
too far past the pump to get gas...

:39:48
...there was no backing up.
:39:50
It was, go all the way around the block
and try it again.

:39:56
Thank God I wasn't the only one.
:39:57
Sometimes there would be seven or eight
of us just circling that Quickie Mart...


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