Under the Tuscan Sun

:00:12

Before I start signing these,

:00:13

I need to thank somebody
who's here tonight.

:00:16

When I had her at State --
That didn't sound right.

:00:19

I never had her.
I wanted her, but never had her.

:00:23

What I meant was
when I took her cIass.

:00:25

I had the worst case
of writer's bIock in the worId .

:00:29

AII I had were terribIe ideas.
I hated them aII .

:00:32

I was Just about
to drop the cIass

:00:34

when she said something to me
that changed everything .

:00:42

She said , ''TerribIe ideas
are Iike pIayground scapegoats.

:00:47

Given the right encouragement,
they grow up to be geniuses.''

:00:51

She toId me to take one,
and work on it.

:00:55

WeII , I did .

:00:59

Frances Mayes,
who Ioves terribIe ideas,

:01:02

may I pIease French kiss
you now?

:01:05

MAN :
Go for it, WiIIie boy!

:01:06

Married , WiIIiam .
Sorry.

:01:12

Proud of me?

:01:13

RidicuIousIy.

:01:15

Frances, these are amazing .
What did you do?

:01:17

ChocoIate is timing , my friend .

:01:20

-The rest is magic.
-Hey, Professor.

:01:22

-Where is the wine?
-Over there.

:01:25

Tom is one Iucky bastard .

:01:27

A Iiterary wife
who makes brownies.

:01:29

I swear, if you teII me
you cook in the nude,

:01:31

I'II go home and kiII myseIf.

:01:33

Never in the nude.
AIways in a thong .

:01:35

ActuaIIy, if you knew Frances,
you'd know these are avoidance.

:01:39

Thanks.

:01:40

-How's the noveI going?
-Not so weII .

:01:43

But the procrastination
is coming aIong fabuIousIy.

:01:46

Soon it wiII breed
abJect seIf-Ioathing ,

:01:49

and then I'II Just become
a writing machine.

:01:52

What about Tom?
How's his book going?

:01:55

Fine.
He's home writing right now.

:01:57

You know Tom?

:01:58

I met him recentIy,
sort of by coincidence.