Jersey Girl

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Everyone, please take
your seats. You heard the bell.

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You know what it means.
Last week,

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the assignment was
to write an essay about your family.

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- Who they...
- Are!

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And what they...

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Mean to us!

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Excellent droning. So l want
everyone to take out their essays.

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We're going to read them aloud
to the class right up here.

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My mom says that me and my dad
have very healthy appetites.

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My mom and dad are very religious.

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When they're in their bedroom at night,
l always hear them yelling, ''Jesus!''

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My mom says my dad's eyes are brown
because he is so full of sh...

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Brian!

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My brother Jack is in eighth grade.

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He told me to ask my dad
who he voted for...

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for... for President.

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l did and my Dad said
he's a total Bush-man.

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That made my brother laugh really hard.

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Whenever my Uncle Stu
comes over to play pool with my dad,

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my mom says the basement smells
like a Cheech and Chong movie.

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Well... it's like this.

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My dog ate my paper.

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l checked, but he didn't poop it out.

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